Thursday, August 19, 2010

setbacks.

on our way down to the outer banks, i received an email from our dossier specialist that broke our hearts a little.

i emailed her to inquire about our timeline and the response i got back was not something i was expecting.

back in april, i wrote this post explaining how we had just made the cut-off for the 2010 visa quota. well, it turns out we really did *just* make the cut.

there are currently eight remaining families waiting to bring home their children from korea this year.

and yup, you guessed it, we're numero ocho.

what does this mean?

well, right now there is a group of children's paperwork at the korean ministry of health, welfare and family affairs for the purposes of emigration permission and passport issuance. this will take about 4-6 weeks. after that group's paperwork has exited the ministry, the next group can enter.

if the ministry permits up to eight children's paperwork in the next group, choi boy's paperwork would head to the ministry and we would get a travel call in approximately 10-12 weeks, in late october or early november. and that's already later than what we were anticipating and hoping for.

but the thing is,

the ministry has been known to take groups of as small as three. THREE. which means, if the ministry chooses to take less than 8 children's paperwork, it could take 16-18 weeks (four to four and a half months!) or more.

that brings us to december or even january. which, in all honesty, makes it a little hard for me to be thankful that we even made the cut-off for 2010. i know, i feel so ungrateful, but a part of me just wants to complain and cry.

do you see why our hearts broke?

:(

we are so anxious to bring our son home, and being the eternal optimist that i am, i keep hoping for the very best, thinking that the best will happen. and when it doesn't happen, and we are met with inevitable setbacks, i end up with some serious heartache.

so, as we nurse our heartache, would you please pray with us and for us? please pray that the ministry would take all of the remaining children's paperwork into the next group. please pray that our son can home to us soon, soon, SOON. and please pray for patience and understanding as we continue to wait.

but above all else, please pray for our son. please pray that as he waits to come home and as we wait for him, he would continue to grow and be healthy physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. pray that his little heart would be filled with joy and his days with laughter and love.

pray that our family would be united soon.

27 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry Grace. You must be with Eastern? I've heard about their EP issues. It's so sad to think that children will have to wait longer because of government "rules" and paperwork issues. I imagine the waiting gets so much harder once you get your referral too.

    I'll keep my fingers crossed that the government takes EIGHT in their next batch. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  2. praying, grace!!! i can't imagine how hard it has been on you guys. hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh Grace I am so sorry that your heart broke upon this news. First let me say that without a doubt Choi Boy is very, very well taken care of right now so rest assured he's just fine. You, on the other hand, just want your baby home. I soooo understand that feeling. Maybe I'm an optimist too but I really think your agency is just preparing you for the worst case scenario since no one really knows what that darn ministry is thinking. However, I genuinely think you will be in the next batch and processed quicker than you think. It really seems like in the last 1-2 months things have sped up over there. Really. I'm hoping and praying that continues .... hugs.

    PS - Are you on the Adopt Talk forum? It's really helpful but it's private and you need a password. PM if you want more info.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh Grace. ((HUGS)) This must be so incredibly difficult. I can't even imagine the heart ache you are going through. I'm thinking of you *all* and sending lots of positive thoughts down to DC and off to Korea as well. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Praying for you...we just brought home our son from Eastern and waited 7.5 months. When I visited in May it was so frustrating to see so many babies waiting to be placed in foster families but the foster families couldn't take them b/c the adoptive families were unable to take home their children so the backlog is not only affecting us adoptive parents and our kids but also the precious little ones in the baby home...so very frustrating...I know Eastern's SW's are also frustrated...praying that the gov't will have mercy and approve all the families in the bunch and open up more EP's so more babies can go home this year!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Big hugs! Sending up a prayer for you and for your son.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Grace, this is such sad, sad news!!! I know that nothing I can say will make you feel any better. Just know that I'm thinking of you guys and sending big hugs and productive vibes to Korea! At least you know that your sweet boy is in excellent, loving and gentle hands with his foster family. Bit hugs!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Oh, this stinks. I'm so sorry. I'm sending hugs and prayers your way.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Prayer said. God knows where your baby is, who your baby is, and what it will take to get him home speedy quick! Hang in there. The waiting is SOOOOO hard.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh, what disappointing news! It's so hard to hear things like that, when you just want that baby home. I will pray for him to come home more quickly than you expected, and for peace for you and Peter. Hugs to you! Hang in there!!

    ReplyDelete
  11. I am so sorry that you receive this disappointing news today:-( I will pray that your son can home sooner than expected. (((HUGS)))

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh Grace that is so hard. I'm so sorry you guys have to wait even longer. Praying for you and Peter and your hurting hearts.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I"m so sorry to hear about this. That is very disappointing. I'm praying for you guys and that it would be soon that you would be able to bring him home.

    ReplyDelete
  14. The wait is so so hard and then to get news like this has to just be devastating. Keeping you guys in my prayers and sending lots of hopeful and positive thoughts your way! Hugs to you guys! :)

    ReplyDelete
  15. i'm so sorry grace. i will be praying.
    with IF and adoption, you get so good at having 'setbacks' thrown at you at every step of the way, yet it never gets easier. it stings every single time.
    i'm not in the same position as you are, but i can imagine how much that sucks big time. love from across the globe!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I am so sorry to hear this!! I have everything crossed for you that you guys will get in & be traveling asap!!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Oh Grace. So very sorry! Big hugs to you.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Praying for you and with you...

    ReplyDelete
  19. we'll keep praying hard! we love you!

    ReplyDelete
  20. Waiting
    John Burroughs

    Serene, I fold my hands and wait,
    Nor care for wind, nor tide, nor sea;
    I rave no more 'gainst time or fate,
    For lo! my own shall come to me.

    I stay my haste, I make delays,
    For what avails this eager pace?
    I stand amid the eternal ways,
    And what is mine shall know my face.

    Asleep, awake, by night or day,
    The friends I seek are seeking me;
    No wind can drive my bark astray,
    Nor change the tide of destiny.

    What matter if I stand alone?
    I wait with joy the coming years;
    My heart shall reap where it hath sown,
    And garner up its fruit of tears.

    The waters know their own and draw
    The brook that springs in yonder height;
    So flows the good with equal law
    Unto the soul of pure delight.

    The stars come nightly to the sky;
    The tidal wave unto the sea;
    Nor time, nor space, nor deep, nor high,
    Can keep my own away from me.

    -- will be praying for you and for our nephew to come home quickly!! --

    ReplyDelete
  21. Big ((HUGS)). Adoption is full of unknowns. Agencies usually want to prepare you for the worst. Praying for you and your family! And of course that cute boy of yours!

    ReplyDelete
  22. My heart is breaking for you guys too :( tears in my eyes as I type this. I can't imagine your disappointment and the torture of knowing your already stretched anticipation will continue even further. We're praying for you guys and your choiboy. A year from now he will be snuggling in your arms and your hearts will be all that much stronger and more prepared to be the most perfect parents ever to Carson and his future sibling(s). Isn't it amazing that God can carry us through such heartbreaking times? He is cradling you guys in His arms the same way you long to hold your baby. Hang in there.. we love you guys!

    ReplyDelete
  23. this is so sad, I'm so sorry. I can't wait to hold my nephew and tell him how great his parents are. I'll be praying for you. Love you!!!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Oh...setbacks. They hurt SO BAD.
    We all know they can come...but when they do...they HURT...deeply.
    I'm so sorry. I hope things move along better than expected. We all know how much you want your little boy to come home. Hugs to you!

    ReplyDelete
  25. The wait is just so freaking hard. That's all there is to say. I hope you guys squeak through into that next batch. And please, vent, cry, retail therapy and do whatever you need to get through this tough time!

    ReplyDelete
  26. Having been through it twice, I know how much the waiting just sucks. Its so incredibly hard to love a child half a world away and have no idea when you will get to bring him home.

    I will pray for you to find peace during the wait and pray that your son continues to thrive in the care of a loving foster family until he can be united with you.

    ReplyDelete
  27. I'm so sorry. It's so frustrating when things are totally out of your hands..and out of your hands half way across the world.

    ReplyDelete

why, hello there! do you have something to say? 'cause i'd so love to hear it!