officially official!!!

yes, it's true, my friends!

we got our official travel call this morning!!!

i took the day off today because i knew i wouldn't be able to think straight and there are about, oh, a gazillion things i need/want to get done before we leave for korea! we barely got any sleep last night -- the hubs claimed we were high on excited energy. :) i went to bed after midnight, woke up at 5:00 with piper and finally fell back asleep around 7:30 for another hour. so, when the call came, here's what i looked like:

love the bedhead and slightly crazy eyes! ;)

we'll be leaving on monday morning and will get to see our son in less than a week! and, i didn't even think of this, but my friend, min, reminded me that this great news comes on the day choi boy turns 15 months! even more special and amazing. :)

and, now i'm in crazy get-ready mode...there's so much to do, i don't even know where to start!

what should i pack???

no, seriously, what should i pack?? especially for choi boy?? any thoughts or advice on what i'd need to bring along would be greatly appreciated!

thanks for rockin' out and celebrating with us! love to you!

it's actually happening. {oh, and my friends are awesomer than yours} ;)

i called the state department this afternoon; it was something i was nervous about doing because i didn't want to hear more bad news. i sucked it up, made the call, and to my utter shock and delight, after checking my info, the woman on the other line said,

"oh, he is so cute! and he had his visa interview today!"


i immediately started blubbering (did you expect anything less??), said thank you, and hung up. thinking back, she probably thought i was crazy!

that was a few hours ago and i'm still shaking. i cannot believe this is actually happening!

a call from our agency director tonight confirmed what we heard from the state department and we were told that she will just need to call us with the official official travel call after they get the physical visa at the korean agency. but, we *will* be heading off to the motherland in a few days!


OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG.

and do you know what the best part is? this amazing news came on the heels of a ridiculously amazing outpouring of love from family and friends. and i *know* it's no coincidence.

when i needed it the most, God provided just what i needed -- tangible evidence of how loved and cared for we are. *so* many friends emailed me out of the blue this week to check in how i was doing and encourage me. and though i didn't email most back because my heart and head were (and still are) so scattered, i was so blessed by their prayers and reaching out. other friends (and my awsome momma and sister) took me out for meals, coffee, and other needed distractions.

and, my blog friends (and i need to stop calling them that. at this point, i can securely say they're truly my *friends*!) stepped it up a notch, too.

my sweet friend, dana, has been emailing with me over the last few weeks and her latest emails have just been the sweetest, most uplifting emails ever. they literally put a smile on my face and in my inbox.

my empathetic friend, min, has been checking in with me daily, as we both waited to hear something about our children and when they'd be ready to travel. i can't wait to meet her in person in seoul.

my talented friend, kris, sent me an incredibly thoughtful and meaningful present for choi boy:

she and my other friend, sue, started an etsy shop (kimchi keepsakes) and one of their products is this adorable buckwheat pillow. the best part is that kris picked the fabric to match choi boy's nursery bedding! you can absolutely bet that i cried when i saw it. ;) (pssst, there's a kimchi keepsakes giveaway happening here!)

my hilarious (and superstitious) friend, christine, had a dream last week about how when she was doing a photoshoot of piper at my house, i got our travel call! so, christine decided that since she could actually be here for a photoshoot, she would do the next best thing and edit a picture of piper for me:

isn't that priceless? is it just me or does it look like that stink-eye has been enhanced? ;)

i am so humbled by and grateful for the incredible amount of love that has been poured out on our little family from *all* of you. never in my life did i think that *this* would come out of our adoption process. it blows me away. and it reminds me of how the Lord provides exactly what we need, when we need it, *even* if we think we need something else. all this waiting has been hard, and so many times i wondered why things were taking so long and complained. but it was all worth it. because today's news is made even sweeter by the fact that i know that there is much cheering happening all around the country for us.

and for that, i cannot thank you enough.

running through my head...

admittedly, there are times when i am complete cheeseball in my music tastes. case in point? one of my favorite christmas songs is mariah carey's "all i want for christmas". i know, it's really cheesy, but there is something about it that gets me boppin' and makes me want to unleash my inner diva.

the other day, i was driving, listening to the all-christmas-music station and this song came on. and i started crying. yes, friends, ugly crying. really, the crying part was not terribly surprising, as spontaneous tears have been popping up here and there quite a bit lately. but what *was* surprising was that it was the lyrics that really got me.

i know, right? a mariah carey song made me cry. (okay, confession: in middle school, "hero" would regularly make me cry, especially after the first world trade center bombing when the song was used for all the rescue worker montages.)

but, these lyrics are ones that really echo what's in my heart...and for your listening pleasure as you scroll through the cry-inducing lyrics, my favorite version of this song, from "love actually."

:

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is...
You

I don't want a lot for Christmas
There's just one thing I need
I don't care about the presents
Underneath the Christmas tree
I don't need to hang my stocking
There upon the fireplace
Santa Claus won't make me happy
With a toy on Christmas day
I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
All I want for Christmas is you
You baby

I won't ask for much this Christmas
I don't even wish for snow
I'm just gonna keep on waiting
Underneath the mistletoe
I won't make a list and send it
To the North Pole for Saint Nick
I won't even stay awake to
Hear those magic reindeers click
'Cause I just want you here tonight
Holding on to me so tight
What more can I do
Baby all I want for Christmas is you
Ooh baby
All the lights are shining
So brightly everywhere
And the sound of children's
Laughter fills the air
And everyone is singing
I hear those sleigh bells ringing
Santa won't you bring me the one I really need
Won't you please bring my baby to me...

Oh I don't want a lot for Christmas
This is all I'm asking for
I just want to see my baby
Standing right outside my door
Oh I just want you for my own
More than you could ever know
Make my wish come true
Baby all I want for Christmas is...
You

All I want for Christmas is you... baby

see what i mean? it's everything i'm thinking and wishing right now...well, maybe not the "i just want to see my baby standing right outside my door" part. it would be a bit creepy to find a 15 month-old choi boy suddenly standing outside my door. i mean, i would love it, but it would be weird.

goodness, this child needs to come home! pretty soon, it'll be jonas brothers and justin bieber songs that will be making me cry!

cherry on top and some confessions.

it's another no-good-news-monday, but there's no use dwelling on that, right?

let's move on and talk about some more fun matters. like blog awards!

my sweet blog friend, heather, was so kind in passing on this "cherry on top" blog award to me.


isn't it cute? i'm a sucker for anything with cupcakes. ;)

heather and i "met" last winter on the hannah's prayer forum and she has been a source of encouragement and laughs. heather and her husband are in the process of adopting domestically. if you have a moment, pop on over and say hello!

i get to pass this award to five other beautiful blogs. yay! i'm going to pass this award on to five blogs that i love and to whom have not yet had the privilege of passing on an award. it's so hard to narrow it just five, but here we go:

dana at plum.tree.studio -- dana and i have been emailing back and forth a lot lately and she is just the sweetest. and she's super talented, too. and i swear, we'd be the best shopping buddies! :)

colleen at noah and simon -- colleen cracks me up and her boys (human and furry) are simply adorable. seriously. oh, and she's married to an alec baldwin look alike. ;)

sandra at across three continents -- sandra and i met by chance at a friend's yardsale, then discovered our mutual blog friends and have since become friends IRL. i'm going to admit it, i have a crush on her son. his eyelashes slay me.

kelly at life with briar -- kelly's little briar has a smile that lights up the internet. FOR real! right now, kelly is doing a walk down memory lane as she celebrates the day briar joined her family two years ago.

jrs at find joy now -- j just recently adopted a new little one through domestic adoption and i love reading her posts about the joy in adjusting to this long-awaited role. and her little guy is so cute!

there's really no other part to this award, but i thought i'd mix things up a bit and throw in some confessions (mostly because i had already written this part last week -- i love prewriting and scheduling posts!)...

we're all friends, right?

i need to unload some things. i hope we're still friends after this, too.

okay, ready?

*i am a complete and utter klutz. on any given day, i will have a cut, scratch, or bruise on my body and i'll have no idea where it came from. i'm *always* bumping into things or tripping. one of my greatest fears is falling down the stairs. and with choi boy coming home, i'm really worried about falling while holding him.

*i don't wear heels. i think they're gorgeous and i'd love to wear them, but because i'm a klutz, i literally *cannot* walk in them. the last time i wore heels, i actually did fall down a flight of stairs. at a party. in front of my friends from work. and no, i was not under the influence. it's really just *that* bad.

*i watch the d*sney channel. like, a good amount. and not for "research" purposes of trying to relate to my students, but because i like it. i don't like all of it, but there are a few shows that i find really entertaining. have you ever seen "wizards of w*averly place"? selena g*mez is hilarious. trust me!

*but, i'm really conflicted about the d*sney princesses. on one hand, the musical theatre geek and romantic in me is totally sucked in by the music and singing and fairy tales, but on the other hand, the smithie in me TOTALLY cringes and rolls her eyes. i will say, though, that i feel like *some* of the princesses are not too bad...belle has always been my favorite because she loves to read and is an independent woman, and rapuzel in t*ngled was pretty butt-kickin', too.

*i'm really bad at being punctual. it's awful. i really need to change this.

*my favorite parts of my body are my wrists. they're unproportionately tiny and dainty. ;) i love them. but they're also super weak. actually, i'm just weak in general. almost embarssingly. must start lifting...

*i'm really awkward on the phone. i try to avoid talking on the phone if i can. if i have to make important phone call, i rehearse before actually dialing the number. there's just something about not being able to see the person and not being able to read their facial expressions/body language that weirds me out. i'm really not socially inept in person, promise.

*i don't know how to brew coffee. i've never really been much of a coffee drinker. and what's funny is we got 3 coffee makers for our wedding! we kept one for guests, but i don't know how to properly use it and usually end up apologizing and asking one of my coffee-loving guests to make the coffee. i have a feeling coffee is going to be my best friend very soon, so i need to learn. any helpful tips?

*and finally, i am SO excited about choi boy coming home...but, i'm also totally freaked out that i'm going to mess up. and i promise i'm not fishing for compliments, but truly, i'm worried i'm going to have no idea what to do! eek!




phew, glad to get all that off my chest. ;) are we still friends? do you have any burning confessions you'd like to share? c'mon!

typical.

right now, i'm waiting so, so hard for monday. as a distraction for me and perhaps for you, too, and whatever awaits you on monday, let me tell you about a little incident from last week that seriously illustrates my life.

so, last wednesday, i had to give a presentation at another school on writing workshop in kindergarten. on tuesday, i was busy getting my presentation ready and my laptop totally wigged out. like, crazy black screen, weird message, won't turn on wigged out.

i love technology, but it also freaks me out sometimes. in college, i was totally that girl whose paper got deleted as i was working on the last page because i forgot to save or because of some other equally lame reason.

anyway, i speed walked (sped walked?) down to the computer lab (no running in school!), and showed my laptop to our tech teacher.

she looks at the message on my screen and goes, "the problem is that your keyboard is not responding."

me: huh?

her: there's probably dust and crumbs and stuff under your keys that are preventing them from working properly.

me: um, okay.

then she proceeds to get that aersol-can-looking-duster thing and go over my keyboard. magically, the warning message goes away!

so then i said, "you know, while i'm here, can you look at my right speaker? it's not working."

and she looks at it, looks at me and says, "yeah, it's FULL OF CRUMBS." (emphasis added by moi)

the speaker also got duster vacuumed and voilà! it's functioning again.

so, to recap, everything that was wrong with my laptop was caused by it being embedded with crumbs.

*oops*

i swear, i don't eat while i'm on my laptop. well, at least not all the time.

i told the hubs this story when i got home, and he goes, "that is SO something that would happen to you!" and cracks up in my face.

thanks, babe.

coping mechanism.

hi, there.

thanks for all your love. i so needed/still need it. ;)

today was a better day.

fo sho.

wanna know my secret?

keeping myself busy and distracted.

with what, you ask?

take a peek:

the hubs says it looks more like ornament balls decorated with a little bit of tree. whatevs, i love my big glittery ornaments. t*rget dollar spot -- holla! oh, did you notice our ghetto "tree skirt"? uh huh, that's a blanket. ;) the hubs wants to make sure you notice the prominently displayed wisconsin W.


freshly baked cookies on a cheesy frosted christmas platter. and a vanilla candle. mmmm...love. oh, and hello, choi boy!

that empty pie tin? there used to be a boston cream pie in there. it was delish.


don't judge me on my fluff picks.



was anybody else super disappointed that they didn't do the running leap into a magical lift (à la baby and johnny)at the end?

and my favorite, favorite distraction?

this girl:
who puts up with me, even though i do mean things like that. if you look closely, you can see some drool. i know, i'm evil. but, what self control my girl has! and what mastery of the stink eye she has!

this is her favorite hangout in our house:


see?

did you notice those little pink spots in the first picture? go back and check again.

know what they are?

look:

piper found this sheet of leftover stickers from the valentines i gave out to my students last year. (i was using the sticker sheet as a bookmark.) somehow, without any opposable thumbs, or *fingers*, for that matter, she managed to peel off four stickers and stick 'em on her blanket.

i have no idea how she did it. but i do admire her decorating sense...it's a little vintage-country-living-meets-ironic, no?

my dog is a genius.

zip. zilch. zero.

that's how much good news we found out today.

the hubs talked to our specialist and was told that our paperwork is *still* in the ministry.

so, it's true. we've officially passed the typical 4-6 week timeline.

we were told that our agency in korea is hopeful that we will be out of the ministry within the week. they also said they would do what they could to make sure our paperwork goes straight to the US embassy afterwards. and once it does, we will have to wait some more for our visa interview and our visa to be issued by the embassy.

we were also told that our korean agency hopes choi boy will be home by christmas and that they would do what they can to make that happen. and that's all great, but honestly...i never even entertained the fact that choi boy *wouldn't* be home for christmas!

when i first heard this a few hours ago, i was so angry. and frustrated. and upset. and sad. and heartbroken. how could they delay us even further? how could they continue to withhold us from our son? how could they surpass yet another timeline we were given?

our ticker above now reads that we have been waiting for 9 months. nine months. nine months when we were first told 4-6 months and then 5-8 months. at this point, i think, i *think* (don't quote me on this) that the time between our referral and travel is the longest anyone has had to wait in the korea program. and i want to make it absolutely clear that ours was an exceptional case where we just ended up being on the cusp of the timing estimates each time, and that it's just the way the chips fell that things had to be re-estimated every time.

and that's hard. and sad. but it's also the reality that the korea program now faces and will continue to face. i have friends who will, unfortunately, wait even longer to bring their babies home.

and you know what?

there's nothing i can do about it.

no matter how angry, frustrated, upset, sad, and heartbroken i am, there is *nothing* i can do to make this process go faster.

and while i can sit and wallow in self-pity and sadness (which, honestly, is kinda what i've been doing), it's not going to help.

so instead, i'm going to try my darnedest to make the choice to rejoice.

i'm going to rejoice in the fact that we do have a son and that he is healthy and loved and that he *will* be home. and though he might not be home on our timeline, he *will* be home. and though we may not know it right now, there is a reason for this extra wait. perhaps it is to grow our own character and to truly learn and live perserverance. i don't know. but He does.

so. i'm going let go of my own wants and desires and instead, trust and find joy.

and to help me, i'm pulling out the big guns. that's right, friends, christmas cookies; christmas decorating; cheesy chick lit; and even cheesier movies are making themselves cozy in my life.

and you know what else helps?

all of YOU.

you and your love and support and encouagement mean the world to me. truly...i cried reading each of your comments here and on f*book and feel so cared for knowing that your prayers and thoughts are with us. we are so thankful for each of you that make up this incredible community.
i would be an even bigger hot mess without you.

oh, and p.s. we've already been told we won't hear anything until monday. never in my life have i wanted it to be monday so badly.