this week is national infertility awareness week.
and though i don't talk much about it now that choi boy is home, infertility was (and still is) a big part of our journey.
last year, i wrote about lessons i had learned through infertility.
this year, things are a little different because i *am* a mom now. but the sting of infertility still stealthily lurks underneath and jealousy, bitterness, and sadness can still rear their ugly heads at times. and i hate that. i think it's because for a long time, i felt like our infertility indentified me. and i'm learning to shake that, but healing deep wounds is a process.
but wounds are also reminders. reminders of lessons we have learned; places we have been; changes that have shaped us into who we are today. and i don't want to forget any of those important things.
as i mentioned before, at this point, i am mostly just grateful for the situation our infertility put us in because it lead us to choi boy. and thought of not being *his* parents is just unthinkable.
but, i know how heartbreaking and difficult the road of infertility can be. and i know how isolating and lonely it is because people just dont't talk about it. and i know that it feels hopeless and daunting and it consumes you. and i know that it often just plain sucks.
and i guess all that's to say, if you're going through infertility, you're not alone. and it's okay to talk about it. and there should absolutely be awareness brought to it.
because chances are, if you're not on this road, someone you know is.